So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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