Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Best friends brother. Beat that.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
