I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
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