i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
