I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Pants 0. Shit 1.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
