do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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