the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Randomize
