so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
either way he was missing a nipple.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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