When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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