Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
