She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
