it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize