dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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