His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Randomize
