I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
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