As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
