She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
