I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
