therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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