Jerry, you need to find god
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
