i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
What a dumb baby whore.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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