I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
