We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
