I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
