Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
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