Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
