Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
