I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
