I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
