you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Randomize
