she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
