chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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