Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
we're making bets on your personal life
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
