She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
