I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
