You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I can tuck mytits in my pants
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
