all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I need a beard to bite.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
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