Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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