sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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