look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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