I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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