You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
