The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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