I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
i've created a new STD.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
