I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
