Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
