I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize