I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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