this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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