I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
